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Sunday, June 1, 2014

2nd Thoughts

and 3rd and 4th...about going to teacher's college.

I keep wondering if it's really the best decision to go back to school in the Fall to get a degree to be able to teach at the K-12 level (requirement in Canada to do so).

Yes, I'm excited to do it, and it's what I've wanted to do for many years. It's really my last chance to go - it's the last year it's a one-year program (I am SO not doing 2 years of school, for time and financial reasons), I applied* and got in, we have the financial ability to allow for it, and I feel like the last few years of being in science education & outreach has led up to this.

But...

so many Buts.

The biggest is financial.  It will cost us anywhere from 60-80% of our savings to cover tuition and the difference between DH's salary and our monthly bills for 8-12 months (the program runs Sept. - May, but could be until the following Sept. to find work (hopefully)). Is it selfish of me to put that kind of financial strain on our family?

The hope is, in the long run, it will be worth it. Teachers here make a very decent salary, with great benefits, and awesome vacation time. As well, of course, as making a different in so many lives! So, if I can find work relatively quickly, it will pay off.

But, what if I don't find work as a teacher (as many people are finding themselves in that position lately)? Are we just throwing that money down the toilet? Then I'd be back to square-one...no job and less money...and then what?

Maybe, instead, I should just find a job that I'm qualified for right now. No, it probably won't be a dream job. Perhaps that was something I should have considered a few years back (definitely not happy with some decisions I made), but now the needs of my family should outweigh my career desires. If I got a job, we wouldn't have to worry about paying for childcare, vacations, or renovations that we'd like to do.

Another But is the timing --- School would start in the Fall, and Evan will be starting kindergarten, and Carter will not even be a year old. I feel like I should be there for the kids during these times of transition. I wonder if I should consider staying at home for a few years until both kids are in school full time before pursuing a different career (though I know I'd find a hard time going to school if it's a 2-year program).

I keep flip flopping back and forth, and don't know which way to go. Do I take the path I've wanted for years, and put us in not-so-great position financially for the (hopefully) short term? Or do I forget about that path, and focus on reality and find suitable work now? Or completely give up on working for now and stay at home to support our children in their early years (which won't last forever)?

Oh, great blogosphere, what would you do?

*While in the hospital after my stroke...if that doesn't prove my dedication/desire to do this, I don't know what does.