Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Lacking Focus

Note: not looking for advice or anything, just need to get this out!

Last time, I touched on that I'm feeling that my life is lacking focus, and it's so true. There are just so many things on my mind and things going on that I sometimes just feel lost trying to keep up with it all.

Her's a snapshot of what's going around in my head:

Careers stuff
- Will I get into teacher's college? If so, can we really afford it? Will I be able to be a student again? What about finding a job afterwards?
- What if I don't get in, what will I do then? What kinds of jobs can I apply for with my background? Should I look into other certificate programs? If so, what and where, and how much will that cost? Would it be worth it?

(these things don't actually stress me out - or else they wouldn't be "hobbies" -  but just other things in my head while I'm making a list)
- Knitting: I really want to get this damn afghan done, and I want to work on Carter's sweater. I'd also like to try a pair of socks. Oh, and I'm a bit bummed that the knitting group I started has been a bit slow.
- Reading: There are just so many books I want to read. Can I read them all at the same time? Plus $$ for books.
- Blogging: talked about this last time.
- Oh yeah, and I want to learn how to play the piano!

House stuff
- This house is not meeting our needs, and definitely won't in a short time when Carter's up and about.
- Do we want to stay in our house and renovate or move to another house that would meet our needs better?
- If we stay, what projects do we want to do? What's a priority? What exactly do we want to do? How much will it cost? When can we do them?
- This house needs to be more organized! How much is that going to cost? When am I going to have the time to do that? What should I tackle first? What should I try to sell, or what should I donate or just trash?

Kid/Family Stuff
- Things to do while at home with Carter during the day
- What to do on the weekends to keep everyone happy and entertained
- When to put Evan back into part-time daycare
- When to start Carter in daycare
- Why is Carter waking up multiple times in the middle of the night, or waking up at 5am, and can we do anything about it? I'm guessing it's just a phase...
- When should we start Carter on solids and I completely forgot how we did that with Evan, so I should figure that out soon...
- When will DH and I be able to spend any tine together just the 2 of us?

Oh, and don't forget the random thoughts/flashbacks about the stroke (these are always fun). I sometimes wonder if I think about all these things, or want to do a million things, because my mind (and body!) was idle for a while?

Maybe there are just too many things going on right now, or maybe we're just busy and getting used to being a family of four. Maybe I'll feel better once I start school (if I get in) or get a job and have something that's only for ME.


  1. Me, I'm just lacking sleep.

    I will give unwanted advice on the food-- start when the kids wants it and doesn't spit it out, also the aap changed from saying to delay to 6 mo to 4 mo is ok again. Don't know about Canada's version. And there's no science on how to start--you can do western style purées or baby led weaning and it probably doesn't make a difference.

    1. I'm also lacking sleep, which probably = lack of focus :S

      We did BLW with Evan, so will try it with Carter too. I kind of just forgot how we did it, so I'm brushing up by re-reading specific sections of a BLW book. Our paediatrician said to start anytime after 4-5 months if he's showing signs of readiness/interest.

  2. I remember feeling the EXACT same way two years ago (when the little one was a several-months-old baby) - the feeling persists to some extent now! Why can't I focus for more than ten minutes? Because I'm always interrupted every ten minutes. Some kind of conditioning.

  3. You seem busy and very giving. It can be nice to give yourself half an hour of "me-time" every day. In that time: no obligations, no plans, no goals other than to just enjoy your life.