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Monday, July 29, 2013

The "Second" Shielding Effect

I've been experiencing a very different pattern with this pregnancy, which has been unexpected and relieving.

First, I get the typical questions - When are you due? Do you know if it's a boy or a girl? How are you feeling?

Then, it's always "Is this your first?"

Last time around, when I answered this question with "yes", I would get the motherly-looks and out came the barrage of advice and you-don't-know-what-you're-in-for looks/comments/stories.

This time, when I say "no, it's my second", that's generally where it stops! No advice, no horror stories, no your-life-is-going-to-change comments. People seem to get that a been-there-done-that mom isn't in need --- nor does she want --- unsolicited advice.

Yes, there have been people who've made comments about having two boys (you're going to be busy! Get ready for lots of fighting!), but it hasn't been nearly as intrusive as the first time around.