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Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Unfulfilled

Lately, I've been bummed out by how I've been choosing to spend my free time in the evenings. Usually I end up watching TV or surfing the web, and then all of a sudden it's time for bed and I feel like I wasted my time.

There are all sorts of things I imagine myself doing instead: reading, knitting, biking, taking tennis or swimming lessons to improve my abilities, taking a cooking course, starting a couch-to-5k running program, taking up my clarinet again, cleaning, doing things around the house, baking....so many things.

So, why can't I get off my butt and do these things? I seem to have a never-ending list of excuses: I'm too tired, I just ate, I deserve to "relax", and I'm not feeling well (headache, stomach ache, or achy neck/shoulders are the usuals) are all the reoccuring favorites. What it comes down to, though, is I just don't have the motivation to climb out of my lowest energy state. 

Another problem is how I define "relaxing" - for some reason, I think it means to basically turn off, tune out, and dumbly stare at a screen. Then I feel like butt later. When I do something more productive, I always feel so much better. For some reason, though, I just can't connect that feeling to motivating me later on (this is the same with working out - always feel great after, but that never helps when I have to do it the next time).

Do you find yourself in motivational ruts? How do you get out of them?