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Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Impostor Syndrome on High

Wow - did I ever have "damn, am I stupid" day today :(

I met with my supervisor and gave him the rest of my thesis (a good thing, yes). He hadn't read anything else I had given him over the past two weeks, but he told me he'd try to read everything by the end of the week.

Right after lunch he brought me my intro with corrections. For some reason I'm really taking these comments personally, and it doesn't help that he wants me to add a TON of stuff. Now I don't know where to start, or where to add certain sections...I just feel overwhelmed and freaked out. I only have 19 days before I have to submit it.

Then I went to a PhD defense - the student has 7 published papers...SEVEN!! Well, one was a second-author paper...gah!! Who publishes seven papers during their PhD?? I couldn't follow her talk at all, not even the title slide!

Anyway, I feel like shit and just want to cry (and have on and off all afternoon - just ask DH). I just want this awful part of my life to be over already!